We're trying to remodify our loan, like everyone else in the world. And seeing as how millions of people read my blog, I feel it my responsibility to inform the masses of what this process is truly like. What you're about to read is not an exercise in creative writing like previous posts. It's the actual conversation. Names and loan numbers have been changed to protect the innocent.
ring, ring, ring
WF: Thank you for calling Wells Fargo. Please enter your loan number, followed by the pound sign.
Me: 122***99932 #
WF: Thank you. Please enter the last four digits of your social security number, followed by the pound sign.
Me: 34** #
WF: Thank you. Please be advised that any and all information given can be used to collect a debt. (Translation: We don't really give a flyin' poo about you and your house. We want our money.)
Press 1 for English. (gurr)
Me:1
WF: Press 1 if you're calling about your WF home mortgage.
Me: 1
WF: Thank you. Please enter your loan number, followed by the pound sign.
Me: 122***99932 #
WF: Thank you. Please enter the last 4 digits of your social security number, followed by the pound sign.
Me: 34## #
WF: Press 6 for loan counseling.
Me:6
ring, ring (Getting excited that I might actually speak to a human.)
WF: (Still not a human.) Thank you for contacting the WF loan counseling department. Please enter your loan number.
Me: .....but I already...ugh, fine. 122***99932
WF: Thank you. Please enter the last 4 digits of your social security number.
Me: ... but I already....ugh, fine. 34**
WF: Please hold. A representative will be with you shortly.
CUE ON HOLD MUSIC IN THE FORM OF PHIL COLLINS.
Music: Su, su, sussudio. Oooooh........There's a girl that's been on my miiindd. ALLLLL the time! Su, su, sussudio.
2 MINUTES LATER
WF Rep: (THICK South Carolina accent) Hi! I'm Roberta. Can I have your loan number please?
Me: (SERIOUSLY!!???) Ugh, 122***99932
WF Rep: Thank you. And the last 4 digits of your social security number?
Me: (You've gotta be kidding me.) 34**
WF Rep: Thank you. And please note, any information you share during this call can and will be used to collect a debt. (WF doesn't give a flyin' poo. Again. I got it.)
What can I help you with this evening Mrs. Poo-lard.
Me: I've faxed in forms to remodify and was calling to check up on the progress. It's been 2 months, and we haven't heard back from anyone. I've called a few times and have re-faxed forms repeatedly, and still no response. Any idea when it'll be finished?
WF Rep: Well, these things take time. About 90 days on average. Your account says it's pending.
Me: Could you give me any more specifics?
WF Rep: I will see. Please hold.
CUE ON HOLD MUSIC. STILL PHIL. APPARENTLY IT PLAYS ON A LOOP.
Music: Su, su, sussudio! Oooh! If I just say the WOOOORRRRDDD!...
WF Rep: Hi. Thank you for holding. I don't see that you've sent anything in for a remodification.
Me: I've been going through this for over 2 months now. I've faxed in forms left and right. Would you mind checking again? There's got to be an error on your end. (Bad choice of words. I can now hear her getting pissy.)
WF Rep: I'll check again. Please hold.
Phil: AHHH! If she'd call me! I'd be there. I'd come running. All my life....
WF Rep: Thank you for holding. It says in your file that the last expense form you sent in only had one signature and we need the signatures from both borrowers to accept it. If we don't have the proper signatures and paper work sent to us every 25 days, you'll need to reapply for the modification all over.
Me: I sent that 2 weeks ago. Was anyone planning on contacting me about this so I wouldn't need to reapply and start from scratch?
WF Rep: No, ma'm.
Me: Of course not. Well thanks Roberta. I'll go ahead and fax newly signed forms over tomorrow.
WF Rep: Is there anything else I can help you with tonight, Mrs. Poo-lard?
Me: No, that'll do it. Thanks.
WF Rep: Thanks for calling, and have a great night.
click
Is it just me going through this? It seems like WF has every idiot in South Carolina working for them and against me, as it's come to feel. I go through this every week with them. Calling to get some sort of news on my loan, and getting absolutely nothing. Stay tuned, for future installments of "Conversations With Wells Fargo Representatives." I'm sure they'll prove to be as useless and frustrating as this one.
......
6 comments:
oh.. you should have gone through our neighbor..the youngs.. he's in our ward. You wouldn't have all these problems. My parents just did this too and he even came to my parents house once to sign docs.
Arghhhh! I would serioulsy be pulling my hair out! I've heard Wells Fargo is a bear to work with. I hope you have your breakthrough quick! Keep calling and become their pain in the A#*. Oh and keep recording every conversation you've been having with them. Who you speak with and when.
HA! That was a hilarious depiction. (Not a hilarious situation, but you captured it quite accurately.)
We're not the biggest fans of WF over here either. Their reps still call us to get us to re-open our accounts with them, & Matt will say something like, "Maaaybe, if WF hadn't FIRed me a few months ago..." That usually shuts them up! :D
Hope your loan remodification gets resolved soon! Whenever I deal with Customer Service Reps over the phone, I always find myself questioning, "Where do they FIND these people?"
That sounds frustrating. You know what else is frustrating, you telling me that you were dialing numbers and getting no "boo-beep-beep-boo-beep" sound effects.
Simply maddening.
Ug. Good luck on getting through everything -- sounds super frustrating!!!
Wait, how do you know it's SC? The NC accent is very similar...
(I should know, I grew up in SC!)
Sorry it's such a pain, though.
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