Dysfunctional enough to be funny

Both my sister and a dear friend of mine are pregnant for the first time. As I was paroosing Target yesterday picking out baby shower gifts, I had the odd pleasure of observing a young couple starting their own baby registry. They couldn't have been older than 20 and not married according to their ring fingers. Baby-Daddy looked less than thrilled to be there. In fact, he just looked plain pissed off with his gangster wardrobe and pierced face. Baby-Mama scanned things with that little scanner doodad, trying desperately to get his opinions on pacifiers for which he seemed to have no preference for. I literally laughed out loud as they argued over what to scan, and had to muffle it and pretend like I was coughing. It was a sorry sight. I hate to judge (sort of), but I'm guessing this particular couple will have a hard time when little Gangster Jr. comes crying into the world. But really, it's hard for everyone and anyone who tells you different is full of it.

I know everyone hates getting parenting advice when they'r'e pregnant or marital advice when they're engaged, but there are some things I wish I would have known before I had Taylor....or then again, maybe it's better to have been in the dark. So for Stephanie and Jennifer, here are three pieces of advice for you. I'm sure you've been DYING to know what I think.



1.) You will be tired. Let me repeat this because it's important that it doesn't come as a complete shock to you, as it did to me. It's the kind of tired that you've never felt before. I used to be so tired that I'd hear the baby cry, and roll over to Wes instead of the baby. I'd try to lift up his head, thinking it was the baby, attempting to nurse him. I was dellusional.

You'll be so tired that you'll lose everything, like keys, remote controls....your mind. This exhaustion will cloud your judgement and make you more emotional than you've ever been. When you only have one baby and other parents tell you to "sleep when the baby sleeps," WE'RE NOT SCREWING AROUND. If you're baby's asleep, that's not your cue to do the dishes or fold laundry. If you want sanity, you'll drag your tired ass to bed, not to the computer to check your email or post pictures of the little tike. That can all wait until daddy gets home.



2.) When people offer to help, take them up on it. This was SO hard for me as a new mom, because I felt the urge to prove to myself, my child, the world, that I had it down! But when someone offers to watch baby so you can take a much needed break, just hand him over and be thankful. Don't feel guilty. Babies have horrible eye sight initially anyway, and unless they have super sensitive smell, they probably won't notice you're gone anyway.



3.)One size doesn't fit all. You'll do things one way and the mom down the street will do it another. If something works for you, do it. Don't let the one-upper mommies out there make you feel like you're doing something wrong because it's not exactly what they're doing.

http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/the-10-most-irritating-least-helpful-parenting-tips-ever-2448391.html This article made me laugh. Wish I had written it. =)

I'm so happy for my sister and Stephanie.....and even for the random couple at Target.